Sunday, September 16, 2012

What Best Friends Talk About

My best friend (Y) and I met as college roommates.  It was not love at first sight. We bonded 4 months later over the the Presidential Election between G. W. Bush and Kerry. And by bonded I mean we yelled at each other and the TV the entire night and somehow woke up best friends the next day.

Because we are cool like that.

We are complete opposites in opinions of politics and religion (mostly) and yet we have, at the core, a basic life philosophy that is, in their differences, very similar.

Also, we are both awesome.

These are the type of deep passionate discussions we have:
 Due to a massive issue with the sewer lines and a construction site all bathrooms are closed at my place of work until further notice. We have port-a-potties provided because of the nature of my job, I am not allowed to leave at any point during my shift.

Me: *gags* I know its "girly" but I hate it.
        also I can't go pee right now because the other room that opens into the courtyard has the doors open and      they are singing hymns.
And they could see me go
and hear me.
and I just CAN'T

    • Y: Oh
      I'm sorry
      but I'm laughing over here
      • Me:I know.
        it is soo stupid
        but i can't pee to "yes yes yes oh lord"

          Y: bwhahahahahaha

          Me: Oh god, can you imagine if they were praying and then they just hear this stream of pee?

          Y: You do know they have to pee too right?

          Me: Yes I know. I pee with the door open when B (my hubby) is home all the time. ... cause I'm classy like that ya know.

          Y: meh, I do that too

          Me: It disturbs me because the thing smells like medicine

          Y: the port-a-potty?

          Me: yes. 

          Y: well, would you prefer it to smell like ass?

          Me: But it will by tomorrow. This is a TRAGEDY. There is no consoling me. My peeing time has been RUINED.

          Y: rofl. I thought you had to pee super fast anyway.
        • Me: I do. So it was a precious small window that is destroyed even MORE now.

          Y: there will be fare worse things to deal with when you become a mum... best to start now.

          Me: Nope. refuse to believe it. This is the worst ever.

          Y: rofl

          Me: Also the punk kids yelled out really loud "JESUS ROCKS" and I wanted to punch them.

          Y: ??

          Me: because it scared me and I need to pee so it was scary for that reason too

          Y: rofl
          Me: it's a good thing we are good friends. Talking about pee and pee related incidents when only one of two women has kids is a good sign of a solid friendship.

          Y: Why? you'd kick me out for laughing at your distress? No, really. I think you offering to strip for me so I could come visit is a sign of a solid friendship.

          Me: true. 

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